These are facts

Scene: I'm volunteering at a preschool, trying to get a very tired toddler (17, maybe 18 months old?) to go to sleep. I'm rubbing his back and stroking his hair and forehead.
Very Articulate 3 year old with STRONG Southern Accent: "Excuse me. He is not a dog. You shouldn't pet him."
Me:"You're right. He's not a dog."
End Scene.