Friday, July 17, 2009

It's like a cult initiation...

Thus ends my 2nd week of being a housewife. Last week was truly manic. I had 3 close relatives in the hospital for different things and didn't have time to call or send a card. I truly was unpacking/ cleaning/ organizing 13 to 14 hours a day. We did the big, U-Haul rental move last weekend and are going up to Greer for one last time (sniff sniff) tomorrow and Sunday to clean up the house and meet with carpet and vinyl repair people. I'm happy with the work I've done planning Allie and Alex's wedding (location decided on, deposit made for location, caterers narrowed down, wedding cake baker procured, invitations purchased) and feel like I will be busy but managable until all the awesome festivities are over. I've been reading the Bible much more than I have in the past several months and having a closer relationship with God makes me feel wonderful. However, this week I have had several moments of wondering, "What do housewives DO?" I don't mean stay at home Moms, I mean housewives. For real, I have a house to unpack and even I'm done my daily errands by noontime. My goal for the rest of the summer is to learn to drive a stick shift. However, there is one housewife-ish habit that is slowly, lecherously growing on me like a barnacle or mold or kudzu...Jon and Kate plus 8.
SWEET SASSY MOLASSY THOSE KIDS ARE CUTE!!! First, allow me to list all the very legitimate, well considered reasons why I despise the show. 1) I am totally against fertility treatments. Hey Catholics, do you recognize that, in theory, fertility treatments are just as much messing with God's procreation plan as abortion is? And yet no fertility doc is killed at his church. NOT THAT I AM SUGGESTING THAT AT ALL. AT ALL. However, there are FAAARRRR too many children in foster care and for domestic adoption who need loving parents to legitimize using fertility treatments. 2) Whoring kids out without the kids' consent is horrible. At least the Duggars (http://www.duggarfamily.com/ ) have older, consenting kids to whom their show gives most of it's attention. There's a very thin, wavy, gray line between mother and madam when you have basic cable videotaping your infants coming home from the hospital. 3) It really irks me when people think their kid is super special. There's a difference between being happy that your child really practiced hard and won the soccer regionals or whatever and feeling that everyone needs to be intimately aware of your totally normal kid's totally normal goings on. Like, when parents have blogs or YouTube channels or whatever, that's for a specific audience who chooses to participate. I mean, I guess America can turn the channel, but still, TLC, come on, stop telling me about these kids.
BUT THEN THE TIDES TURNED. OH MY GOD Y'ALL. Alexis and her Aldergator? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yhYB4IxXPTQ Joel telling the camera crew he has a weiner? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dhzLXvndXgs Alexis telling people Aaden will throw up on their hands? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tAbF6FI85S0 Collin eating everything, all the time? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cOvLI9zpj4E&feature=fvw

OVARIES SET TO DESTRUCT! OH MY GOD THESE KIDS ARE CUTE!!!
P.S. If any more advanced bloggers, or like, people from 2004 or something can tell me how to make words into links without having to paste the actual link into my blog, that would be awesomesauce.

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